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Everybody has that one friend who can enter a room and automatically attract the attention of everyone within it.

They have an infectious energy that people are naturally drawn to and want to connect with.

We all know this one person whose unconscious influence seems to pave the way for good fortune across all areas of their lives.

Their self-belief permeates through the universe and attracts everything good to them.

Whatever they set their mind to just seems to happen, while you’re left wondering how and why.

Whether it’s in their career, relationships, finances, family, or goals – they have that golden ticket!

You might dismiss all this as ‘good luck’ – never thinking how things just always seem to fall in place for them.

But it’s almost certain that the one quality they have that distinguishes them from others – and possibly you – is self-confidence!

Ways to increase your self confidence

1. Improve your self-talk

This is a biggie. What are you telling yourself? Too many people have negative self-talk going on in their minds.

They think (and tell themselves) things like: ‘I’m stupid,’ ‘I’ll never make it’, ‘I can’t get anything right’, ‘Nobody’s interested’. And you know what? They’re right – because they make it happen.

They start to believe what they tell themselves. Then, they act on that belief. And as a result, they get what they think they deserve.

And that’s how thoughts create our reality. So, to change our reality, we have to change our beliefs and thoughts – which means keeping our self-talk positive.

If you catch yourself saying something negative – change it.

Talk to yourself kindly, and supportively.

Be positive and encouraging. Praise yourself. If you can’t think of positive things to say to yourself, use some stock positive affirmations. There are plenty available in an internet search, and some useful articles that explain their use and the theory.

2. Stop comparing yourself to others

While it’s good to have role-models and people you admire or aspire to be like, it’s a problem when you compare yourself unfavourably to them. Or when you compare yourself to anyone else!

If you’re dissing yourself or putting yourself down if you’re not as successful, wealthy, popular, good-looking or fit as they are – this affects your self-confidence and starts to become as poisonous as negative self-talk.

Do other things instead of comparing yourself to others.

Use yourself as a measure, if you have to make any comparisons at all.

Look at far you’ve come. Look at what you’ve achieved. Compare yourself with your past self – as long as it’s positive. Know your strengths and relish them.

3. Accept praise from others

People who lack self-confidence are notoriously bad at accepting compliments and praise.

All too often, this is because they don’t value themselves and can’t accept their own worth.

But if you react badly to praise, you’re dissing the person who is offering it to you.

Consider praise to be like someone giving you a precious gift.

It’s not given lightly by most people. Accept it graciously, and most importantly, take it to heart.

4. Strike a conversation with a random stranger each day

Be bold, and speak up when you’re around someone new – on the Tube, in a queue, at a workplace, in a shop – there are even online chat groups for strangers.

If it helps, imagine you’re hosting a party and trying to put them at ease.

As well as giving you practice in speaking to strangers and making human connections – it can put a smile on someone’s face – and yours.

You might learn something new, or who knows? You might even make a new friend. There are some tips here.

5. Take acting lessons

Learn how to project your voice, stand and move with confidence, develop winning social skills and express yourself effectively, so that people take notice.

There are numerous reasons why you should take acting classes for confidence.

The benefits reach way beyond the experience itself – you will grow as a person, and so will your success. If not lessons, join an Amateur Dramatics group, but the teaching element won’t be so effective as going to classes and learning from professionals.

6. Join a toastmasters group

Toastmasters International is an organisation of clubs that provide opportunities, training and experience in public speaking and after-dinner speechmaking.

Even if you don’t want to give formal speeches for a living, it offers amazing leadership and self-development opportunities that build self-confidence in a safe space.

I encourage staff at my companies to join their local clubs and the boost in their confidence has been phenomenal.

7. Celebrate your wins

It’s easy to speed on from one task to another without looking back. However, it is vital to celebrate achievements along the way.

So, congratulate yourself on your progress, on reaching a goal or achieving a win – even a small one – to build your confidence and self-esteem.

In fact, celebrating the small victories in life is a tried and tested method for making progress and achieving your bigger goals. Here are some ways to celebrate your whole self, too – in all aspects of your life.

8. Commit to trying a new activity each week

It’s only when we step outside our comfort zone that progress is made, or learning happens.

People can get in a rut with their habits and thinking – so, challenge yourself to do something different each day.

Even if you start small – by taking a different route to work, your perspective will change, and you’ll see and learn new things.

Build yourself up to doing new activities to boost your self-esteem and confidence. You will open your mind to new possibilities.

Pretty soon, you’ll be abseiling down the Shard – or at least, be more open to new experiences and ideas.

9. Be the first to step forward and volunteer

What usually happens when someone asks for a volunteer? Everyone steps back – or at least holds back. This is crazy, because it’s not even about them – it’s about the person who needs help.

Be the one to step forward with confidence. Put yourself out there – outside your comfort zone. Focus on helping someone else.

There are a great many benefits to be gained from volunteering in the community, too.

10. Face one of your fears and rise above it

Most people avoid the things they fear. But that way, they never confront them and never overcome them.

They remain fearful and anxious forever. But fears limit us. We need to take back our power and control our fears by facing them and overcoming them.

Break those old patterns that limit you by taking your fears in hand.

Once you have held that snake, done that sky-dive, or made that speech – there’s no going back. You’ll be unstoppable.

These are just some ideas I’ve thrown in the mix to help you with aspects of self-confidence that can make you a successful entrepreneur.


Motivational Quotes for Success

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